Binding: Hardcover
Dewey Decimal Number: 153.85
Format: Bargain Price
Label: St. Martin's Press
Languages: Array
Manufacturer: St. Martin's Press
Number Of Items: 1
Number Of Pages: 224
Publication Date: 2005-02-01
Publisher: St. Martin's Press
Release Date: 2005-01-13
Studio: St. Martin's Press

Customer Rating:
Summary: Excellent...
Comment: This book was excellent... You really can't change everyone, but this author does provide excellent guidance in helping difficult people who are their own worst enemies. But don't think you can change or save everyone you may try with- you can't. A great read nonetheless, especially on influence and persuasion.

---

Customer Rating:
Summary: Don't waste your money
Comment: What a bunch of cr%$. This is the stupidest "self help" book I've ever seen. Yes, I did read it all. It was shallow and egotistical. Example - under how to get someone to stop nagging, it says that the only reason someone nags someone else is to get attention. Nope. I nag my kids to pick up behind themselves because I want them to pick up behind themselves. This book tells you, supposedly, how to change other people to suit you. He doesn't explain what to do when someone tries to change you and you don't want to be changed. Another example - for a grandfather trying to help his drug addicted gang member granddaughter - his advice is to move or send her to the Peace Corps. Dumb stuff. Save your money unless you want a good laugh. If this is any indication of the level of all of his books, don't buy any unless it will help you balance a table.

---

Customer Rating:
Summary: overtitled but insightful
Comment: Lieberman's basic assumption is that most people want to be liked, want to be reasonable, and want to act in such a way as to increase the chances of getting what they ultimately want. If you can hack into their motivations, you can tap that energy, and through subtly addressing these drives and motivations you can engineer win/win attitude and behavioral shifts. Sometimes this might even be the case.

The book is broken down into four general sections, encompassing 29 more specific chapters. The general sections focus on changing a person's values and beliefs, their emotional state, "plastic surgery for the personality", and altering attitudes and behavior. Within those general subjects, and one cannot conceive of subjects much more general than these, are chapters covering changes such as "change a stingy person into a generous one" or "make anyone more interested in anything" and "make anyone more moral and ethical".

The advice Lieberman gives is fine so far as it goes. His appreciation of psychology and motivation is deep and appears sound to this layman. Once the general 'problem' with an individual is identified and explained, the author will recommend and illustrate a series of potential strategies to be used to deal with and alter the behavior. At least none of these will make the matter worse. Some may help, if the other person is calm, acts rationally, and is willing to listen. Of course, the problem in real life is that so many people who have serious personality or behavioral issues do not simply sit there are react as rational and calm people would hope or expect.

The good part is that the book is worth reading perhaps mostly to gain greater understanding or confirmation of the motivations of other people or oneself. The less good part is that exactly those people who act most exasperatingly are those most resistant to self examination, reflection and consideration, and serious change. They can perhaps be temporarily manipulated into doing one thing; but over the long term, personalities are not as malleable or subject to molding by outside influences, especially when this influence is limited to a few lines of dialogue or conversation.

As such, then, I think the book's title promises far too much. Lieberman has good understanding of people, and writes very clearly; at least some of his examples and illustrations are well considered. But don't expect to read this and be able to hypnotize and manipulate your friends and foes the following week.

---

Customer Rating:
Summary: super book!! One of the best self help books I have ever purchased!
Comment: I have used a number of techniques from this book in my personal and professional life with GREAT sucess. Can't wait for the next book!

---

Customer Rating:
Summary: Common Sense
Comment: I must confess I did not read the entire book word for word because it struck me as being pure common sense. I would not recommend the book unless you are just starting out in life and do not have much experience dealing with people.

---